dear mister.

it is not kind to send your hormonally-challenged, fat-cha wife pictures as such...

(ReAL chicago pizza)

and this...

(lakeshore drive on a beautiful day)

here's a tip, paco...

next time you go to her hometown and send these kinds of things, you might leave her with something other than nathan's hotdogs cooked on the STOVE (okay, they actually don't suck) which will be placed in lovely albertson's buns or maybe at least bring her back some fannie mae candy (the milk chocolate butter creams) or a new cubs hat or an italian beef sandwich or photo booth pictures from navy pier or cotton candy from wrigley field...

...i'm just saying...

signed, 

the wonderful woman you have to come home to...

sanford

xo